Despite being seemingly shallow, friendships help develop a child’s self esteem. Friends are an audience for showing off. A child will push another child. When the other child fumbles or falls, he realized that he is stronger than that other child is. The child feels good that his strength is affirmed.
Friends provide the toddler with a competitive environment. The child gets positive reinforcement when he thinks he has the best toy in the playgroup, or when he is the tallest or the strongest, or when he always gets his way.
However, competition with friends can adversely affect a toddler’s self esteem if he is always the last, the smallest or the weakest. If he is not competitive by nature or he doesn’t get enough reinforcement, the child who is placed in such situation repeatedly, or maybe even just once, will probably cope by staying away. He will not want to be with those friends again. He may even refuse to go out or be with any other playmate for some time and retreat to the comforts of playing alone or with mommy or daddy in his own backyard.
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